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George Burns
American
January 20, 1896
Comedian
How can I die? I'm booked.
George Burns
Tags:
How
Die
Booked
Be quick to learn and wise to know.
George Burns
Tags:
Know
Learn
Wise
Nice to be here? At my age it's nice to be anywhere.
George Burns
Tags:
Age
Here
Nice
Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.
George Burns
Tags:
Money
You
Make
I would go out with women my age, but there are no women my age.
George Burns
Tags:
Women
Age
Out
You've got to be honest; if you can fake that, you've got it made.
George Burns
Tags:
You
Got
Made
This is the sixth book I've written, which isn't bad for a guy who's only read two.
George Burns
Tags:
Which
Only
Two
If you live to be one hundred, you've got it made. Very few people die past that age.
George Burns
Tags:
Age
You
People
You know you're getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you could do while you're down there.
George Burns
Tags:
You
Know
Your
Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman - or a bad woman; it depends on how much happiness you can handle.
George Burns
Tags:
Good
Happiness
You
